Why did I kiss him? I keep asking myself this because now I feel trapped by someone who is completely unavoidable thanks to the fact that we live just a hall away from each other. What was I looking for in that abandoned lounge in the basement at 4 in the morning? Someone to talk to, surely. It was dark and he was handsome and I felt confused, rejected by someone I've been lusting over for a month or so. So why did I kiss him? To feel better about myself? To feel less lost and alone?
Why did I let him think that those cheesy and completely ridiculous lines were working on me? They weren't. I'm absolutely, totally and 100% unimpressed. Maybe he is right, in one sense, maybe I am different than other girls. Because I don't fall for dark, muscular men in the corner against a brick wall looking into my eyes telling me how beautiful I am. I'm laughing to myself right now just thinking about it.
You think you have me wrapped around your finger? You think I've fallen for you? You are barely a passing thought during my day, all I want is the quiet blonde boy with the glasses who intrigues the hell out of me for a reason I can't put my finger on. All I want is the one with the sideways smile and the goofy laugh. All I want is the one who seems unimpressed with me, the one who is uninterested.
Circle of life.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
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